This year, I am not making any resolutions. Instead, I decided to list the top things that I want to leave behind in the old year. In my opinion, this will help me grow and better develop as a soldier of love and life who is learning to pick her new battles and heal the wounds from old ones. Reflecting back, 2010 wasn't a bad year for me. I went back to school, and published a second collection of poetry. Along the way I learned a lot about myself, especially spiritually. Most importantly, I re-discovered a lot of my strengths, as well as weaknesses. However, the coming of the new year is just another chance to get with the program and work on those weaknesses. I already know 2011 will be a year of challenges and excitement, as well as a year for completion (I graduate in December '11). I am soo ready for all of it!
This list of eight things is a small reflection of what I discovered in myself and in the world in 2010. I wrote these in the last eight days of 2010 and they are in no particular order - just listed them as they came out. Also, please feel free to tell me what you want to leave behind in '10. Happy New Year to you and your loved ones! Wishing you all nothing but love, light, and joy for this up-coming year and beyond. xo.
#8 - Self-doubt.
Set fears aside, ask for help if needed, and take little steps towards goals and the things you want the most. It's not about when you got there, but how.
#7 - Living within yourself and the walls you've built.
To truly make an impact in the world or person, you must first push yourself and others out of their comfortable seats, for change is impossible without movement. All revolutions begin this way. Rumi said it best: "Forget safety. Live where you fear to live. Destroy your reputation. Be notorious."
#6 - Useless battles.
There are things worth fighting for in life. And there are things that are simply not worth fighting for. To recognize a worthy battle, ask yourself if it is first, winnable, and second, if it will make you happy and create a positive change in your life. Life is short. Spend your energy wisely.
#5 - Dysfunctional/unhealthy relationships.
You either invest the energy to fix it (see #6), or you move on and walk away for good. People are complicated. Relationships are even more complicated. It will always be this way. Embrace differences and learn to either forgive, or forget.
#4 - Self-rejection.
Who are you to not love the only person who has the capability to love you the most in this world? If I reject me, you will reject me. Envelop all the good things you are and build upon yourself a tower of steel and heart.
#3 - Hate.
Hating on, or simply hating someone leaves no room for love's energy to seep through. Hate is like an airborne disease. Once it makes its way in the air, it contaminates and kills everything around it. Leave it alone, or do it quietly in the comfort of your own soul. But remember, it does take it toll.
#2 - Superficial happiness.
Trying to attract so-called happiness by obtaining physical objects is unfulfilling. It's not about what you can buy. It's about what you can't buy. You can't buy true happiness, and you can't buy another me. Strip me of my clothes, jewelry, money, and make-up, but I am still rich because I am still me. My heart, soul, mind, and gifts are invaluable and cannot be taken away.
#1 - Distractions.
They take your attention away from the things that truly matter. And they waste time. At the end of the day, those things count for absolutely nothing towards the thrown you envision yourself sitting in tomorrow. Release the elements that disrupt you from blooming. Plant your goals and stick to the agenda. Water your seeds and watch your world flourish.